


Of Pick-Up Lines and Idiots in Love

by Karumasa



Series: Pick-Up Lines for Dorks [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, I don't understanding tagging, It's good enough, Like really bad pick-up lines, M/M, Oikawa and Iwaizumi being dorks, Or formatting, Pick-Up Lines, cuteness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-22
Updated: 2015-09-22
Packaged: 2018-04-22 22:02:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4852124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karumasa/pseuds/Karumasa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All these notes and pick-ups lines were seriously starting to piss Iwaizumi off.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Pick-Up Lines and Idiots in Love

**Author's Note:**

> I really hate pick-up lines but I just couldn't resist.  
> If there are any mistakes tell me. It was like 2am when I wrote this.
> 
> Disclaimer: The story is mine. Any others similar are a coincidence (Though I would love to read them). The characters also belong to Furudate, Haruichi, no matter how much I want Oikawa to myself.

_“That shirt looks very becoming on you… Of course if I were on you I’d be coming too.”_

Iwaizumi looks down at the front of his shirt. The sage green knit sweater stares back, at least two sizes too big, and not quite soft yet not quite rough enough to be itchy. Disregarding the note all together Iwaizumi promptly crumbles the paper up and throws it in the trash on the way to class.

 

* * *

 

 

_“You look like the type that’s heard every line in the book. What’s one more?”_

Taking the note out of his locker Iwaizumi calmly folds it and puts it in his pocket. Taking out the books he’ll need once he’s home Iwaizumi closes the locker and leaves for volleyball practice. On the way he makes a stop at a bathroom. The note swirls nicely in the water before it is sucked down into the toilet graveyard.

 

* * *

 

 

_“Your daddy must have been a baker because those are some nice buns.”_

Iwaizumi glares at the piece of paper hanging from the inside of his locker door. It’s the third one this week. He’s never seen the handwriting before so he can’t tell who has written it. He also doesn’t understand how they keep getting inside his locker since they’re placed too far away from the slits in the top to just be dropped in. The fact someone he doesn’t know is giving him horrible pick-up lines and knows his locker combination annoys Iwaizumi.

He rips the note off his locker door and shreds it into pieces with his fingers. Dumping the pieces into the trash and storming off Iwaizumi doesn’t see the person watching him from around the corner, smothering their laughter.

 

* * *

 

 

_“I’ve got a thirst and you smell like my Gatorade.”_

Surprisingly this note isn’t inside his locker. Instead it is attached to the side of the water bottle in his sports bag. It wasn’t there before practice so someone must have come in when the team was busy to tape it to his water bottle. Miffed at where these little notes of pick-up lines are coming from Iwaizumi shoves it into a pocket of his bag before anyone on the team can see it. He decides to throw it out on the way home.

 

* * *

 

 

_“Hey I noticed you looking at me from across the room. I’ll give you a minute to catch your breath!”_

The teacher’s voice is nothing but muffled background noise as Iwaizumi stares at his notebook. Right in the middle of a blank page perfect little symbols stare back, mocking him. The fact that it’s in his notebook irritates and baffles Iwaizumi. How did it get there? His notebook has been on his person this entire time. No one borrowed it and he didn’t leave it unattended even for a few seconds. The fact that the handwriting is perfect, so perfect that it looks like it was typed, is also irritating and baffling. Who is writing this junk? How are they writing it? Why are they doing this? Scowling at the perfectly written pick-up line Iwaizumi hesitates. It really is pretty as far as handwriting went. Simple, neat, and easy to read.

Quickly deciding he didn’t care Iwaizumi harshly scribbles out the words with his black pen. All these notes and pick-ups lines were seriously starting to piss Iwaizumi off.

Deep chestnut brown eyes watch the furiously moving pen. A tiny quiet giggle escapes before the eyes move their attention back to the teacher for the remainder of class.

 

* * *

 

 

_“I hope you don’t mind me giving you this rose. I just had to show it how beautiful you were.”_

Sighing exasperatedly, Iwaizumi stares at the mass of red at the bottom of his locker. The cheesy pick-up line on the attached card he expected at this point. The roses? Not so much. Scrubbing his hands over his face Iwaizumi just barely keeps from pulling his hair out. Picking up the roses to get a better look Iwaizumi spots another piece of paper under the roses. Holding the roses in one hand and the paper in the other Iwaizumi reads the second note.

‘Did you know 13 roses symbolize a secret admirer and that red ones mean love and passion?’

Sighing yet again, Iwaizumi sets down the roses so he can tuck the two notes away in his bag. Picking up the roses once more, Iwaizumi shuts his locker door. While heading for the doors to go home Iwaizumi is actually glad that there isn’t volleyball practice today.

 

* * *

 

 

_“Believe me when I say that my heart cries out to you and if kisses could be sent through writing every note so far would be read with your lips.”_

The startling realization of just who is sending these shitty pick-up lines hits Iwaizumi like he’s been smacked in the face with a stray volleyball. Of course it’s him. Iwaizumi feels the urge to slam his head into the neighboring locker for being so stupid. Now that he actually thinks about it the sender has always been obvious. With the beginnings of a plan forming Iwaizumi starts off to practice. Figuring out at least half of the mystery has put him into a much better mood than he had been in for the last week. He still doesn’t know how half those notes were placed where they were but that’s a mystery for a later date.

 

* * *

 

 

_“That’s a really nice smile you got. It’s a shame that’s not all you’re wearing.”_

Iwaizumi watches from the corner of his eye as a pastel pink blush settles over pale cheekbones. Fighting the smirk that threatens to overtake his face, Iwaizumi continues to swap out books at his locker. He watches as the note is shoved into one of the boy’s pockets and the flushed face has disappeared in the waning tide of students. There’s a noticeable lightness to the way Iwaizumi walks to the rest of his classes and during practice.

 

* * *

  

_“I know a great way to burn off that pastry you just ate.”_

Thumping the choking brunette on the back, Iwaizumi has to take a bite from his own lunch to retain the neutral expression he has. He’s starting to understand how difficult it is placing these notes without the other noticing. The reaction is totally worth figuring out how to put that note under the slice of cake though.

 

* * *

 

 

_“As long as I have a face you’ll have a place to sit.”_

The startled squeal almost made Iwaizumi break down into uncontrollable laughter, blowing his cover. He was just barely able to hold it back as he watched the crimson faced man rush out of the room telling the teacher he didn’t feel well. Once class was over Iwaizumi rushed outside before breaking down laughing. Once he had calmed down enough, Iwaizumi brushed away the tears that had started forming. Walking back into the building he continued with his day, only occasionally snickering about the incident earlier today with the embarrassed, curly haired brunette.

 

* * *

 

 

_“I know milk does a body good, but baby, how much have you been drinking?”_

Instead of choking this time the brown eyed brunette just stared, mouth agape, at the note that was placed on top of his milk bread. The blush that started just on his cheeks was starting to spread all the way to his ears. Iwaizumi didn’t know if they had this much fun watching his reactions but he is definitely enjoying watching the pretty brunette blush over such corny pick-up lines.

 

* * *

  

_“Your warm eyes melt the iciness of my heart.”_

The smile that lit up the curly haired man’s face made his eyes seem even more beautiful. Iwaizumi loved being able to see the emotions that flickered through the dark brown eyes, how warm that turned when the owner of said eyes was truly happy. Being the cause of that happiness left a warm fluttery feeling inside of Iwaizumi’s chest.

 

* * *

 

_“Where do you hide your halo?”_

Probably the cheesiest pick-up line Iwaizumi had given at this point but he didn’t care. It made those brown eyes light up in embarrassed excitement. The bounce in the curly haired boy’s step just gave Iwaizumi another reason to smile that day.

Later, before practice, Iwaizumi found a note in his sports bag with familiar hand writing. After reading it he felt like he was soaring all through practice. The smile on his lips refusing to leave no matter how much the team tried to jokingly poke fun at him for being so happy.

_‘It’s right next to yours.’_

 

* * *

 

_“You are so beautiful that you give the sun a reason to shine.”_

Honestly Iwaizumi should have expected it but the weight that crashed into him still managed to surprise him. The only thing that saved both of them from crashing to the ground in a painful heap was Iwaizumi’s quick reflexes. Grabbing the waist of the person that slammed into him Iwaizumi turned slightly and backed up a step, roughly hitting the wall with his back. He wasn’t given time to get his bearings as there were hands on his face and lips pressed up against his. At first Iwaizumi’s eyes widened in shock, but one look at the half lidded eyes and blushing face told him all he needed to know. Quickly kissing back Iwaizumi wrapped an arm around the lean waist while his other hand busied itself with burying into those soft pecan colored curls. When they separated they both just stared at each other, panting softly.

“I love you so much.”

Iwaizumi smiled and gave a chuckle.

“I figured as much. I love you too, Shittykawa”

“Iwa-chan! That’s so mean!”

“Alright, alright. Oikawa. Or is Tooru better? We are technically dating now aren’t we?”

A blush lit up Oikawa’s face at the thought of Iwaizumi using his first name. His voice cracked even though Oikawa tried his best to control it.

“Yes we are and e-either is fine with me.”

Iwaizumi watched, entranced, as the blush deepened and Oikawa averted his eyes. A mischievous glint entered Iwaizumi’s eyes. Leaning close to Oikawa’s ear he whispered, “How about just when we’re alone, then? How does that sound Tooru?”

Oikawa jumped from how deep Iwaizumi’s voice had gotten. But the smile that spread across his face as he nodded made Iwaizumi’s breathing stop. Getting back under control Iwaizumi placed a light kiss on Oikawa’s lips, smirking.

“Thank-you for the roses, by the way. They were very pretty. Though... I thought that was my job?”

Oikawa laughed, smile never leaving his face. Nuzzling his face into Iwaizumi’s neck he answered.

“It’s both of our jobs. I get to spoil my boyfriend, too.”

Petting the curls, Iwaizumi allowed Oikawa to snuggle deeper.

“I can live with that.”

 

* * *

 

 

_Omake_

“Just how did you get your handwriting to look so damn perfect? It’s kind of freaky.”

“Lots of practice, Iwa-chan. Lots of practice.”

“Then I hope you don’t continue practicing. Your regular handwriting is nice enough already.”

“I-Iwa-chan! I love you so much!”

“Shut up, Shittykawa! Hey, let me go! I am not carrying your ass all the way to class!”

In the end, Iwaizumi did end up carrying Oikawa to class.

**Author's Note:**

> I swear if anyone used these lines on me I would probably fight them.  
> Also don't ask how the note got under the cake. The only one who knows that secret is Iwaizumi and he isn't confessing.
> 
> These two give me life. I kind of wish they didn't. I want to cry.
> 
> Also my first post on this site. Hooray! Still don't understand formatting. I'm going to go die now before my next two classes.


End file.
